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Sofi Elkin and Stan Weems, who sleep in separate bedrooms, face online trolls but claim it improves their marriage. Their viral story highlights the benefits of personal space.
Real Life

‘My husband and I have slept in separate rooms for a year and a half – trolls say our marriage won’t last’

Katie Dollard
Last updated: 2024/07/11 at 4:33 PM
Katie Dollard
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5 Min Read
Sofi Elkin and Stan Weems. (Picture: Jam Press)
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A woman has revealed how she and her husband sleep in separate bedrooms – and online trolls say their marriage won’t last.

Sofi Elkin, 30, and her other half Stan Weems, 25, have slept in separate rooms for the past year and a half, after Sofi saw it was working for other couples online.

It was something that had never crossed their minds previously, but Stan agreed almost immediately.

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Sofi, a content creator, shared their sleeping routine to Instagram, where the video has gathered over 6.5 million views.

“The benefit I’ve noticed is that when we do sleep together – we call them sleepovers – it’s special and we get excited leading up to it,” Sofi from Baltimore, US, told What’s The Jam.

Sofi Elkin and Stan Weems, who sleep in separate bedrooms, face online trolls but claim it improves their marriage. Their viral story highlights the benefits of personal space.
Sofi Elkin and Stan Weems. (Picture: Jam Press)

“It feels like we’re still dating.

“A lot of married couples, ourselves included before having separate rooms, forget to still ‘date’ and get excited about spending time together.

“We also both get better sleep.

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“His room is cold like he likes, mine is warm like I like. And if either of us snores or gets up early, it doesn’t disturb the other.

“We are also both neurodivergent and have specific ways we like our space to be, especially me.”

The couple believe their sleeping arrangement has improved their communication.

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She said: “Whether it’s correlated to the separate rooms or not, our intimacy and overall relationship is better now.”

Sofi and Stan, an audio engineer, left their friends shocked when they first told them, but some gave it a go and have also started a similar routine.

Sofi Elkin and Stan Weems, who sleep in separate bedrooms, face online trolls but claim it improves their marriage. Their viral story highlights the benefits of personal space.
Sofi Elkin and Stan Weems. (Picture: Jam Press)

She said: “Our friends who are in their twenties to thirties usually have a positive reaction and say they want to do it too!

“Some of our older family members find it a bit strange, but they’re supportive.”

But online is where people are not always in agreement.

She said: “Online is where we get the negative reactions.

“We get a lot of ‘your marriage won’t last’ or ‘you’re just roommates’.

In a clip shared to social media, the two can be seen dancing to a song as quotes appear on the screen.

The first, above Sofi, reads: “Let’s sleep in my room tonight.”

The second, above Stan, says: “No let’s sleep in my room tonight.”

Another quote above Sofi writes: “Your room is too cold.”

Then Stan’s second quote reads: “We slept in yours the last 5 times.”

Sofi’s last quote then ends the video by saying: “Yours is a boy room!!!”

The post was captioned: “What it’s like having separate rooms as a married couple,” and has gathered over 121,000 likes, as well as 1,500 comments.

Caleb said: “Well this is interesting, and not the norm.”

Emmy added: “So roommates,” followed by a crying emoji.

Someone else wrote: “What’s the point of having separate rooms if you’re still sleeping in the same bed on one another’s room?”

Social media comment on the post of Sofi Elkin and Stan Weems, who sleep in separate bedrooms, face online trolls but claim it improves their marriage. Their viral story highlights the benefits of personal space.
Social media comment on the post. (Picture: Jam Press)

Elie commented: “If I had a room just for myself, my husband would never enter it!”

Another user cried: “Booooooooooo.”

Blue noted: “Maybe I’m to needy but na this won’t fly with me”

Zane quipped: “This is a partnership, not a marriage.”

Whereas some fans agreed with the idea.

Chassity commented: “Separate rooms for the win!!!!”

Social media comment on the post of Sofi Elkin and Stan Weems, who sleep in separate bedrooms, face online trolls but claim it improves their marriage. Their viral story highlights the benefits of personal space.
Social media comment on the post. (Picture: Jam Press)

Alle posted: “I do it, I love it.”

Orbi wrote: “Goalssssss.”

Another person added: “Just so you know: my grand parents alwyas had separate bedrooms. Why would ppl react like it’s a new thing and, moreover, a bad thing baffles me.”

Gem said: “My partner and I have our own rooms and NEVER sleep together, unless we’re camping or we have to. I need my space, I like bed all to myself.”

READ MORE: Tradwife dubbed ‘husband’s slave’ shares controversial marriage rules – from no male friendships to ‘submitting’ to husband

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