A woman who claims to have had an affair with her church pastor has revealed how she broke the news – announcing it in front of the entire congregation.
Suzette Jansen was a member of her local church for 30 years, but hasn’t returned after making the bombshell admission last year.
Now, the 56-year-old is speaking out on her decision to confess – lifting the lid on how the affair with the married man started.
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Suzette, a teacher from Cape Town, South Africa, met the 60-year-old minister when he joined her local church 12 years ago.
Though not initially attracted to him, with her focus on caring for her elderly parents, she bonded with the church official as their health declined.
“As they [my parents] became weaker, the minister would come to the house every three months to give them communion,” Suzette told What’s The Jam.
“Then one day out of the blue he asked for my number when I opened the gate for him.
“He was a pleasant person with a nice personality.
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“Three months after we started chatting, we met in secret.”
During the meeting, she claims he kissed her – and said “sparks began to fly”, kickstarting what would become a six-month affair.
Suzette said: “I thought it was love.
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“In the beginning, we talked a lot and we laughed a lot.
“We took turns picking each other up and going for drives.
“Sometimes, we’d be intimate in the car.
“Other times, we would check into places.
“It was quite an expensive affair, but we always shared the costs 50-50.
“He said things weren’t going well in his marriage.
“There were the secret glances we’d give each other in church while he preached.
“Especially when he told a joke, we would catch each other’s eye.”
When Suzette asked if she was his only mistress, she says her lover became “withdrawn” and would ignore her.
She claims she tried to cut things off on several occasions, but a message from him would weaken her resolve.
She added: “One always thinks a man will change.”
When she finally called time on their romance in February 2020, they continued to see each other occasionally at church.
Suzette said: “I had opened my heart to the minister and the more I thought about it, the more I knew there was a reason for it.”
She found that ‘reason’ two years later while attending a silent retreat.
She explained: “There, in the silence, I found clarity about what I needed to do.
“Masks had to fall away.
“People had to realise that ministers are just people and shouldn’t be placed on a pedestal.
“They aren’t saints.
“What happens behind closed doors in the dark always comes to light.”
The confession led to some fall-out, with Suzette’s family members allegedly shunning her for a period.
The minister has reportedly denied the claims, and the local church is believed to be undergoing an investigation into the alleged affair.
Suzette added: “I understand it’s probably out of fear that he says this because the events can impact his work.
“But I know what my truth is.”
But despite the controversy surrounding the tale, and her very public admission, Suzette has no regrets.
She said: “I’m sure there are people who think I’m a Jezebel, but I don’t feel that I’ve vilified anyone.
“Things that happen in the dark must come to light for the sake of healing.
“I was terribly afraid people would stone me like the woman in the Bible, but I remembered what Jesus said: ‘Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her’.
“The minister was put in my life’s path for a reason.
“It happened so I could talk about it in the church to encourage and motivate others to speak out about healing.
“If it can help one person with their decisions, it was worth it.
“What is bad is that I had to hurt families – my daughter, his wife and parish members who looked up to him and now have to deal with their disappointment and disillusionment.
“[But] for the sake of my future grandchildren I’m breaking chains of guilt, hiding and shame.
“It’s time for us to speak publicly.
“I simply couldn’t remain silent.
“I would’ve felt guilty on my deathbed.
“I am now free to talk, to be myself.”
