A woman reveals she has already planned her funeral – from the playlist to her outfit – despite being just 30 years old and in good health.
Katie Cosgrove first became fascinated with death at the age of 15, after tragically losing her dad, Bob Mariacher, at the age of 82.
This eventually led her to pursue a career as a death doula, which is someone who helps people navigate the loss of a loved one.
And it’s opened her eyes to funerals – with the young woman already having prepared for her own send-off.
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Although family members call her “morbid”, Katie believes such planning is crucial to do early in life.
Her plans include a detailed end-of-life Spotify playlist, including music from Selena Gomez, John Mayer, Queen and Coldplay, as well as her favourite flowers, a special shroud and more.
“There should be fresh flowers every day, ideally lilies, lilacs or daisies,” Katie, from Buffalo, New York, told What’s The Jam.
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“People can come and go as they please and nobody needs to feel an obligation to stay with me the whole time or greet/entertain people.
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“I’ve created my own end-of-life playlist and I’d like that playing in the background.
“I want to be wrapped in silk and covered in little mementoes that honour my relationships.
“At the end of the two days, I’d like to have a short ritual with poem reading and be carried by my closest family members.
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“Then, I’ll be transferred to a cremation centre where I’ll be cremated.
“I’d like my ashes bottled up in tiny bottles and distributed to my family and friends at a celebration of life party one year following my death.”
Katie is setting aside £7,250 ($9,195) for the ceremony and plans to pay this cost before she passes to avoid others being saddled with the bill.
She estimates the cremation alone will cost £3,500.
She said: “I chose to plan my own funeral to be prepared because we never know when we’re going to die
“A common fear of people getting older is that they’ll become a burden on their family, but the only burden I see is not being prepared for your own death.
“It saddles your family with decisions that they have to make in the midst of dealing with insurmountable grief.
“It’s never too early to plan!
“Plus, having your own touches on your funeral can make it so much more beautiful and really help people grieve you in an inspiring way.”
Unfortunately, funerals can cost a hefty amount.
Despite wanting to be prepared, her family think her plans are ‘premature’ to say the least.
Katie said: “I think some of my family and friends believe that it’s a little premature to be planning this or morbid to think about.
“It’s a common misconception in our society that talking about death will make it come around faster – I don’t believe that.
“I think talking about death can help us live a purposeful and driven life, alleviate stress on our family members when it comes time and give us control over something we usually feel is out of our control.”
Centring her life around death, Katie helps others come to terms with grief, as well as reassures those at the end of their life.
She said: “I’ve always felt a pull to assist my community in some way and I feel fortunate enough to now be comfortable with death and sitting with the dying, whereas a lot of people struggle with this.
“The most common role of a death doula is to be an advocate for the dying to their healthcare team and sometimes even family and friends.
“They go over the person’s wishes for death and help them become as emotionally, spiritually and physically sound to help mitigate any regrets or anxiety at the end of life.
“I wish that there was a death doula present for my loved ones when they were dying and now, I can be that person for others.”
BREAKDOWN:
Cremation – £3,500 ($4,500)
Flowers for the wake – £300 ($385)
Silk shroud – £1,200 ($1,600)
Urn – £190 ($250)
Wake venue rental – £940 ($1,200)
Celebration of Life flowers – £200 ($260)
Catering – £780 ($1,000)
TOTAL: £7,110 ($9,195)
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