A couple who fell in love after meeting on a virtual games night say people brand their relationship “disgusting”
Jenn Gray admits that her relationship sometimes sparks “weird” reactions, particularly on social media, with strangers claiming her husband is old enough to be her father.
But the 27-year-old says she doesn’t take offence as she and husband Tom, 51, fit together “perfectly” despite the 25 year age gap.
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“People say that he could be my father, he’s old, that it’s disgusting that I could love someone older,” Jenn, from Texas, USA, told What’s The Jam.
“I think it’s funny that people say he looks like he could be my father, because the fact is your earliest memories of your parents are when they’re normally in their 20s and 30s.
“Obviously people don’t meet their spouse and think of their parents.
“And at some point, if both of you aged together, you will both look like your parents.
“And to those that say he looks old and therefore is not desirable, will they leave their spouses when they age”.
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Content creators Jenn and Tom, from Tasmania, Australia, first locked eyes over Zoom in 2020 on a virtual games night.
Jenn said: “He’s always fit in with all ages.
“He thinks all humans are important and worth his time.
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“He’s absolutely a magnet for people.
“They can sense his sincerity, and I did too.
“So we met over Zoom and started becoming fast friends, but there wasn’t anything more at that time.”
While the two didn’t immediately get together, they built a strong friendship that eventually developed.
Jenn said: “I actually had a list of what I wanted in a husband.
“It was really long and he kept doing things that were on the list.
“I couldn’t ignore it after a while, I realised that I just had a huge respect for him as a person.”
Jenn’s list included being someone who had friends of all ages, who wasn’t afraid to cry in public, someone who was manly without toxic masculinity, and someone who would invest time and creativity into their hobbies.
She also wanted someone who wouldn’t be “grossed out” by women’s health issues, and someone who could compliment women without being “creepy”.
According to Jenn, they each had an individual moment of realisation about where the relationship was going.
For her, it was watching a video about long and happy marriages.
She added: “The things they said about their husbands, about what made them good husbands, were all things people had said about Tom.
“And I decided in that moment, if I ever marry anyone, it’s going to be him.”
For Tom, the trigger was rivalry – another man showing interest in Jenn.
When Tom finally asked her on a date, Jenn said no, as she wanted to travel and “experience everything”.
It wasn’t until Tom visited the US as the pandemic was coming to an end that the two finally got together, with Jenn telling him to “ask her again”.
While the two have a 25-year age gap, Jenn says it has never been a concern for her.
She added: “If it feels weird, that may be a sign that it’s not a good idea for someone.
“Obviously there’s things to consider like if you want kids, and if they are willing to do things they’ve already done, but you haven’t.
“So logistics need to be discussed.
“But it never felt weird.
“We just matched.
“We found our other half in each other, and we wanted to have that for life.”
Jenn and Tom discussed their future plans on one of their first dates, deciding neither of them wanted kids and they were both happy to travel together and support any goals the other person had.
Jenn says close friends and family, and even most strangers they’ve met in passing, have never found their relationship unusual.
The same can’t be said for those singling out the couple online.
Jenn added: “They don’t know Tom, so some obviously have a problem.
“And I get it, because there are definitely weird things happening in the world.
“But I was a grown adult when I met him, and I knew what I was doing.
“If I had married someone my own age, no one on the internet would have a problem with it.
“The internet just has an issue with the age of the person I have a relationship with.”
“People say all sorts of weird things.”
One commentor said: “Girl….are u happy being a caregiver?”.
A second person said: “People with 10+ year age gap wtf do you actually have in common to talk about? Seriously?”
A third commentor added: “We don’t talk enough about how it’s so sick perversion for someone to be attracted to people who look like their parents”.
Someone else said: “Ew.”
When Jenn responds politely, she says people often apologise and admit to being jealous of their love.
The couple, who got hitched 2022, say they now “just live life having fun”, spending time on writing, creating content and travelling.
Tom added: “I want to take my wife to all of my favourite places, but also have new experiences with her.
“I’ve been to Iceland, but we weren’t together at the time so I really wanna go back with her so she can see all of the things I love about it.
“A new experience for us would be Cappadocia.
“I want to see the hot air balloons together.
“We want to film all the places we go and share our experiences with people.
“We’re just focusing on being stable, growing our business and being able to get some things done.
“I just want her to be happy, and not stressed, I want to be supportive and help her reach her potential.
“I am happy to be in the background more.”
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